The one about the Mother In Law, the dry turkey and the new Boyfriend

My Mother In Law called last night to invite the family over for Christmas Dinner. Flyfour had answered the phone to her in a sudden rush of conscience knowing that a phone call at 9pm on a Tuesday evening couldn't be ignored as she would know we were in and the excuse that we had turned the sound down on the phone and so didn't hear it ring is wearing a bit thin. There was a small amount of small talk that I didn't pay any attention to having zoned out as soon as he had announced it was her calling but it was when I heard my name mentioned I started listening in to his side of the conversation.

I think Pippa has invited her Mum over or she would be on her own for Christmas.
Pause
Oh well that's nice that you would include her Mum.
Pause
I'll have to check with Pippa and what she has arranged.
Pause
Yes I will let you know.

When Flyfour got off the phone he let me know that my Mum was included with us in the offer of joining his Mum and her boyfriend for Christmas Dinner. I don't think in the ten years that Flyfour and I have been married that we have been invited over for Christmas Dinner. In fact I only remember being invited over once and even then it was an interesting meal with Turkey Roll that was dry and vegetables that were overdone. I don't think that my taste buds could take another assault like that one.

Then of course there is the issue of her boyfriend. My MIL's husband died less than a year ago, and it's not that I'm saying that she shouldn't have a boyfriend, or even that she should be dressed in black and weeping over her dead husbands grave on a daily basis but it just seems odd to me that she is ready to move on so quickly. To have the first Christmas without her second husband (Divorced the first, widowed by the second) to be the first Christmas with her new boyfriend and to want your family who has only been for dinner once in the last ten years to be there to witness it, it just seems a bit crass. It isn't just me is it?

I'm leaving it up to Flyfour what we do. I'm not making this decision just like I don't make any of the others.

A Poem To Memorise

When my parents were getting divorced someone sent me a poem by Philip Larkin to read.

Philip Larkin - This Be The Verse

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.

They may not mean to, but they do.

They fill you with the faults they had

And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn

By fools in old-style hats and coats,

Who half the time were soppy-stern

And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.

It deepens like a coastal shelf.

Get out as early as you can,

And don't have any kids yourself.

I don't know about you, but I think it's a poem for every generation.

Full Dark, No Stars by Stephen King

When I brought the Sweet Valley Book I also picked up Stephen Kings "Full Dark, No Stars" as part of the 2 for £8 offer in Tesco. At first glance I misunderstood and thought it was just one story where the four teasers on the back all played part of one story but I soon realised that it was actually several stories which had a common theme; That of committing a crime. I've been a Stephen King fan for several years, (thanks to my Mum who liked to watch Horror Movies and would let me watch some of the less scary ones with her) and spent a lot of time reading his back catalogue. Well, he did start writing books five years before I was born and that was about twenty years before I started reading them!

I had sworn off Stephen King for a while after reading Cell and a couple of other stories that made me have very vivid nightmares, but it has been about a year and I figured that I would be able to cope with the stories in the book. I was right, the tales haven't haunted me in the same way as Cell did or even the way that Duma Key did when I refused to play with a tennis ball at the beach in case there was a ghost ship ready to moor just off the sandbank.

The stories can be read in other places which is annoying as it turned out that I had already read a couple of them although it's my own fault for not reading the back of the book properly. So here for you is the back of the book;

What tips someone over the edge to commit a crime?

For a Nebraska farmer, the turning point comes when his wife threatens to sell off the family homestead.

A cozy mystery writer plots a savage revenge after a brutal encounter with a stranger.

Harry Streeter gets the chance to cure himself from illness - if he agrees to impose misery on an old rival.

And Darcy Anderson discovers a box containing her husband's dark and terrifying secrets - he's not just the man who keeps his nails short and collects coins. And now he's heading home...

The stories are typical Stephen King to my mind and it was the two stories featuring women (the second and the fourth) that had me most involved because of the motivation for the crimes that they commit. The book was read quickly (again in a couple of days) and has an rrp of £7.99 but will keep Stephen King fans happy.